“And this is how it feels when I ignore the words you spoke to me”
O how I wish I had listened to your voice. Instead, I listened to another.
“And this is where I lose myself when I keep running away from you”
Away from the one in whom my true identity was safe.
“And this is who I am when, when I don’t know myself anymore”
If only I had come to accept myself within the confines of a healthy relationship with you, instead of derailing my entire life.
“And this is what I choose when it’s all left up to me”
Yeah, I’ve really made a mess of my life.
“And this is how it looks when I am standing on the edge”
Some days are really good, some are hell on earth, many are spent on the treacherous precipice of a raw and ragged faith.
“And this is how I break apart when I finally hit the ground”
Jumping without you as my divine parachute means total devastation.
“And this is how it hurts when I pretend I don’t feel any pain”
Hurts like hell.
“And this is how I disappear when I throw myself away”
When I throw you away, I throw myself away.
This is what I say…what I pray…what I scream at the heavens –
“Breathe your life into me
I can feel you
I’m falling, falling faster
Breathe your life into me
I still need you
I’m falling, falling
Breathe into me
Breathe into me”